Singing Songs I Don't Like
A practice of generosity
One the second Sunday of every month I go to a local nursing home. In one of the lobby areas there is a piano that looks nice and sounds awful. At 2 o’clock, I welcome those who have gathered and launch into one of my best pastoral gifts—playing church music written before 1950.
Let me emphasize again: it does not sound great in this space. But without amplification for my voice (a problem I want to remedy asap) the best way I can communicate is by playing these songs as loudly as possible as I can on the piano. One of the most recent times I was at this facility we sang approximately six verses of How Great Thou Art, with four of the verses just being repetition of the first verse over and over and over.
Another favorite of this group is the song He’s Got the Whole World in His Hands. We sing it every time. And every time I think about how much I dislike that song. My pastor snob self comes out and I think about the gendered language. My inner curmudgeon judges the hand motions. And by the end, even though I’m leading the song, the tempo has been reduced to dirge speed.
But we sing it every time. Even though it’s not my favorite, I’m happy to share. Because I deeply believe in church it’s good for all of us to sing what we don’t like.
I had a seminary professor call this singing for one another. If you don’t like the words or the music you can imagine your neighbor enjoying them. Participating and singing is a gift you can offer and a way you can be part of a community. This philosophy works best in most of our church music debates which are not about deep theological truths (that’s another conversation) but simply our preferences. For a song to be a little faster or slower, for the music to be a little less treacly, to hear a hymn on the organ or on the piano. To give on these details is to be flexible and adaptable, without giving on our deepest values.
Knowing the difference between a preference and a debate that goes deeper is an essential distinction for all people. It becomes a boundary. It allows us to know what we are willing to concede for the sake of time and well-being. Not only that, we are able to offer compromise as a gift in community. To model this (importantly, not as a silent martyr) is to allow others to find ways of being generous.
What I’m listening to
Lots of love for the new podcast Vibe Check with hosts Sam Sanders, Saeed Jones, and Zach Stafford. It is a self-described group text turned podcast. There such joy in being able to listen to their shared friendship.
You should listen to
This unparalleled version of “How Great Thou Art”
What life looks like
Recent flower acquisitions from our neighborhood market